you know you’re really fucked in a scary movie when the crucifix falls over
like there goes jesus
even jesus is done with this shit
"2 spooky 4 me"
*parkours off the mantlepiece*
((Except parkour is not a verb. It comes the original French Le Parcours “the course.” It is a noun. Stop.))
*parkours into your room and knocks your shit over* no one cares
Anonymous asked: Michael, will you marry me?
Well, first of all…
Okay, now that we have that out of the way, let’s get down to bidness.
When I opened the message my first suspicion was that this was some new kind of spam bot that, were I to say yes, would shoot a tranquilizer dart out of my computer and I would wake up the next day in tub full of ice without any kidneys (and perhaps missing a watch, which is a reference to a movie that I only watched because it was rated R, had virtually no one famous in it, and only played after 10 at night so I knew there would be a sex scene. I was right. That’s how I spent my teens.)
My second reaction was that someone shares an affinity for the Ninth Doctor, cat memes, and The Walking Dead and took it upon themselves to secure me for their future. I got excited considering the possibility that my You’ve Got Mail moment had arrived and that Meg Ryan-circa-1998 and I would soon be meeting in a park, to live a life that would truly be happy ever after. I mean, did you see that movie? They wouldn’t have argued about anything except which movie to rent on a Saturday night. And isn’t that what anybody really wants from love? Somebody to sit next to on the couch, watch movies with, and make out occasionally?
However, my cynical nature triumphs once again.
Thanks for asking though!